Y’see, 50 years ago our menfolk didn’t even come into the birthing room. My Irish mother-in-law tells me that her husband would drop her off at the hospital with a ‘cheerio then, love!’ and tootle off to work whilst she gave birth. Then he’d return the next day to collect her and the new baby.

It was all hands-off for those Dads. No blood and guts. No crazy-eyed wife spitting out swear words. Just a drive-by to the front of the hospital to pick up the precious cargo. Easy.

Nowadays we expect far more from our lad s when we’re in labour. You want your man to be there in a physical and emotional sense. Rubbing your back, telling you that you can do it, before heading down to the business end of things to watch you roar a baby out, and giving you a teary-eyed giant hug as he gazes down on your new bambino.

Being present at a birth is a pretty full-on gig (even more so if you’re the birthing person, obvs). To witness what a body can endure is both mind-blowing and, well, kinda confronting. It’s understandable that most men are freaked out at the prospect of watching you birth.

Birth is both amazing and messy.

I asked a bunch of blokes about what scared them most about birth and they said:

Men are relatively simple creatures when it comes to birth. Typically, your guy wants to know what to DO so he doesn’t feel useless. The man wants a clear list of instructions. A job sheet that tells him ‘bring this, do that, ask this, stop that’. Bottom line is he wants to do the right thing, and not let you down.

So many of the hospital and private birth classes are focused on how the birth will unfold, the three stages of labour, and what’s going to happen to your cervix, but what your baby-daddy really wants to know:

I have taken the best learnings from my interviews with the cream of the crop in the birthing world – including Dr Sarah Buckley, Midwife Mark Harris, Doula Brian Salmon, and multiple birth-savvy dads – to create this no-bullshit guide for your bloke. I want him to know that he’s got this birthing gig in the bag, so that YOU can focus on your own birth prep, knowing that your core support person is ready to rock’n’roll.

Make no mistake, we cover off all the important hormonal, physical, emotional, and cervical changes that you will experience. And I share how he can support you through each of the trimesters, stages of labour, and the ring of fire, but I share it in a way that is of the most value to your bloke, in language he can relate to.

Less about what a contraction feels like, and more about how your lover can be the best Birth Bouncer (protecting your space) and Birth Cheerleader (being your rock) that he can be.

This is a real raw blokey interpretation of what witnessing birth can be like for a man and how to be ready for it. It is a slick set of articles, birth stories, videos, and interviews designed to be your man’s cheat sheet on how to be a legend at birth. A set of instructions sent directly to your guy from the experts and blokes who have been there before him.

It’s like “Mate, here’s what you need to know, here’s what it’s going to look like, and here’s what you need to do”, all wrapped up in 6+ concise topics:

I’ve made the WTF Guide to Birth as simple as possible. Your man can read, listen, and watch as much of it as he likes, whenever he likes. There is no exam at the end, but there will be a definite shift in his outlook to birth, and how he chooses to show up for you. Because that’s what you need, right? To know that he has your back. That he believes in you. And that he will be there for you, solid as a rock, when you need him.

Your man can ABSOLUTELY be your secret weapon in birth.

A few key ninja learnings and he’ll be there supporting you to power through every step of the way.

Because here’s what I have learnt after roaring three babies out through my ladybits, YOU will birth. Your body already knows what to do. You are strong and capable. You will get through birth. Your man, well…